MARRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

Hey everybody! I just wanted to take this oportunity to thank everyone who donated money to buy clothes for the family on Thursday. Me and my dad brought the presents to there house yesterday, and they definetly needed what we got for them. Oh, and the girls looked like they would absolutley LOVE the clothes, and the boy looked about the right size too. I can not wait until tommorrow, as I will spending the day with my dads side of the family. Its not that its better with them, just different, as my mom's side has a half dozen kids under 6 year's old, and my sister Abby is the youngest on my dads side. So yeah anyway, I just wanted to thank everybody again for coming to the partay, and I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas!

P.S. This entire post, while completly heartfelt, contains several glaring spelling and grammatical errors that are driving Maya insane right now. She probably wishes she had acess to my blog so she can edit it herself, but, alas, she can't! Merry Christmas Mayah Kuhn!

It's that time of year...

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, it's finally here, the event that we anxiously yearn for this time each year. That's right, the John Hansen Year in Review at the Movies has made it's long-awaited re-emergence. And let's take a look, shall we?

http://www.brainerddispatch.com/stories/122
304/ent_1223040001.shtml

For those of you who'd rather just see the Top 10:
1. Garden State
2. Napoleon Dynamite
3. Mean Creek
4. The Village
5. Miracle
6. Team America: World Police
7. Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
8. The Grudge
9. Friday Night Lights
10. National Treasure

Everyone should now take a moment to linger in the aura of greatness that emanates from every piece of journalistic genius that is the work of John Hansen. And by that, I mean feel free to throw up a little bit in your mouth at the terrible prose, over-abundance of hyphens - that's right, he uses them a crapload-, and incessant name-dropping. That'll leave a great taste in your mouth for the next twenty or so minutes. Until that nauseous feeling subsides, Merry Christmas!

In a theater near you

Just in time for the holidays, "Fat Albert" has been unleashed on the public. Starring the amazingly hilarious Kenan Thompson, this film is sure to be recieve both popular and critical acclaim... What?...The early reviews are in?...Let's take a look for oursleves:

"When the characters return to their TV home at the urging of their real-world friends, it feels like the film is finally acknowledging that it has no reason to exist."
- The Onion A.V. Club

"… content to adhere to a mantra of "when in doubt, dance" rather than finding any clever entertaining ways to punctuate the prolonged moralizing."
- The Hollywood Reporter

"Hey, hey, hey? No, no, no."
- Variety

That is just shocking! But the previews looked so good! I will never trust Hollywood again!

Question of the day Part Deux

Which would rather not be able to control: the volume and pitch of your voice or your bowel movements?

Question of the day

Would you rather fart out of your ears or puke out of them?

Disgusting? Absolutely.
Hilarious? Heck yes.

My bad

Hey everybody. Sorry, I haven't posted in a couple of days, but I'm at home now, so I don't have a whole lot of time. Well, actually I do, but I have other entertainment options at home rather than just sitting at my desk all day checking the updates on everyones blogs. So, all that is to say that I'll try to post, but I make no promises for the next month. After that, its all on again.
Oh, be looking for information on the Christmas party in your e-mail later this week. I keep thinking of cool things to do, so I hope we have enough time to do it all.
Um, I think that's it...........Yep, I'm done. Peace out

Oh Joy!

This has to be some kind of record: The new holiday classic, "Surviving Christmas" starring Ben Affleck and James Gandolfini, released to theaters on October 22, will be available for purchase wherever videos are sold on December 21 of this year. That's right, they're releasing it 2 months after it was first shown in theaters. So, if you know anyone who was particularly touched by this film, wait and get it for them for Christmas this year. And as much as I liked Ben Affleck circa 1999, he needs to stick to his day job (aka, playing second fiddle to j lo and matt damon)

I Heart Christmas Music

There should be a radio station that just plays Christmas music year round. Sure, some of it is kinda cheesy, and some of it just plain sucks, but most of the time it just makes me really happy. I like how different artists can sing the same song and make it sound different each time, and yet each time is amazing. For instance, they could an entire album of people singing "O Holy Night," and I'm pretty sure I could listen to the whole sing several times in a row. Anyways, thats my thoughts. And i get to go home on Saturday now, so I'm excited like no other! and I get to see Oceans 12 tomorrow night, which makes it that much better.

Hey Lindsay, the 80's called... (insert punchline here). 

Baba Wawa

For those of you who thought Barbara Walters still had a thread of journalistic integirty, I believe her naming Paris Hilton one of the 10 Most Intriguing People of 2004 proves you wrong.

The greatest story ever told (A tribute to Maya)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH!!!!! says:

mayah says:
uhhhhhh
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH!!!!! says:
wait, it tells a story
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH!!!!! says:
there once was a cat who had friend who gave him a rose.
mayah says:
hahhaah
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH!!!!! says:
he got the idea to give something back to the friend, but he couldnt's decide whether to wrap a soccer ball, money, or his Ken doll
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH!!!!! says:
he eventually decided to give an island trip, but it started raining when he was there. Then the sun came back out and there was a rainbow
mayah says:
uhh you need to stick a sun in there
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH!!!!! says:
meanwhile, back at home, the cat was seducing his friend's girlfriend, but they broke up when he talked about what she likes to do with sheep in bed behind her back
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH!!!!! says:
and the sun is implied



See that blank space after HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH!!!!! says: ? that's where the emoticons that tell the story are supposed to be. But for whatever reason, they don't work. So the only people who will fully understand this are Maya and myself. And that's the way it should be.

Ahh, Inspiration

To everyone who recently posted on their various blogs about apathy and doing things to help others rather than themselves: Thank you. I absolutely agree with everything that was said. America has so much potential to help not only the people in our own country, but the rest of the world as well. I'm always shocked and disheartened when I hear about the thousands of Africans who die from AIDS EVERY DAY, and then I hear about congress cutting new funding to help curb this epidemic. And then i just get back to my normal routine and do nothing about it. Terrible.
Anyway, this post does have a point: In the spirit of the season, I've decided to add a facet to my Christmas party. What I would like to do is have people bring money donations, and then we'll all go and buy toys and donate them to a toy drive. The only problem with this is that the party is so late in the season, I'm not sure if there are any places still accepting donations. So, if anyone knows of a place that would work or has an alternative idea, please let me know. I think that this could be a lot of fun, and we can start putting our money where we claim our hearts are.
Thats it.
Peace out.

Question of the day

Would you rather sweat cheese or cry mustard?

What's up with people on e-Bay?

After the virgin mary grilled cheese, this seems tame - maybe. A woman has put her father's ghost up for sale on e-Bay in an effort to alleviate her son's fear of his grandfather following his death in their home lost year. The bid's up to like $80, and the auction includes the man's metal walking cane to make it legitimate. When I read the whole story behind it, I can't decide if it's touching or crazy. Either way, it's worth a look.

http://www.cnn.com/2004/TECH/internet/12/04/ghost.for.sal
e.ap/index.html

Question of the day

Would you rather be poor and famous or rich and infamous?

And none of this "i'd rather be plain and simple" crap. It's one or the other, no ambiguity at all. Me personally, I would rather be poor and famous, because everyone would know my name and I could mooch off of all of my famous friends.

So I lied...

If you haven't read the previous several posts, do so before this one.

Ok, I had to put this down before I forgot about it, bc it's too good to pass up.

Sign #428 that the Apocalypse is upon us:

Antonio Banderas has his own brand of cologne called "Spirit"
Does he really deserve a scent? I mean, seriously, the guy hasn't been in a good movie since The Mask of Zorro (Except Spy Kids, and that's an acquired taste that I like but his performance was so-so at best). Either way, nothing says "My career is going down the tubes" like an attempt to move into retail. It also says "My career is going amazingly well, and I'm gonna milk it for all its worth," which is odd that it can signify such polar movements. Ok, so i'm rambling, the point is, in this case, it's the former, and he needs to embrace his role as the token latino in a string of crappy movies and live comfortably wherever he so chooses to. Just don't invade my dorm room with your images of fiesta and fun, cause you're not fooling anyone.
That is all.

I have no life

So, yeah, this is my SEVENTH post in less than two hours. This is mainly due to the fact that I'm at work, and no one ever comes into the store. Like ever. So far today, I've had three customers:

1. Student who wanted to put a poster up in the window.
2. Old guy out for a run who wanted to buy the new Norah Jones but didn't have any money.
3. Student who wanted to look at our jazz selection, which is non-existent (sorry Sully, I don't make the inventory decisions)

Other than that, I am fast approaching the conclusion of my second listen to U2's How to Dismantle an Atomic Bomb (not as good as All That You Can't Leave Behind, but definitely worth it), and I'm gonna go play some superarcade now.

Maybe I did all of this posting bc I feel bad about not having posted anything for a week and a half except for the Ken Jennings eugoogoly (a Zoolander reference to the unfortunate majority who are ignorant to the film's hilarious existence). Then again, who knows. Maybe I'm just bored out of my mind and I have no life, so I live vicariously through my blog-self. Either way, if I post any more today, you'll know that I am officially desperate like a housewife and lay in bed all day looking at my amazing display of Christmas lights that put up yesterday.

Ok, thats it, peace out.

Maybe not - Hannah, or anyone, is there something special I have to do to fix the sidebar on my blog? If you could help me out, that'd be great. Ok, now really, that's it. Peace out

Another Brick in the Wall that is Jennifer Stockinger's Journalistic Legacy

"Another time, Holbrook said his friend found a picture of Howard Dean. They added the words "Hail to the Chief" to the screen and found a mix of Dean's music to play. This graphic was displayed at the beginning and end of the morning announcements."

- From the Josh Holbrook FASOTW article in today's Dispatch. Howard Dean cut a record? Consider my world officially rocked.

http://www.brainerddispatch.com/stories/120204/ent_1202040007.shtml

Distrubing...

Is anyone else mildly disturbed by Ethan's repeated confessions of his love for Hannah on both her blog and his own?
The time on one was like 10 AM. He can't be THAT drunk by then, can he? Then again, it is Ethan...

My finals Schedule

Difficulty rated as follows:
1 - Don't have to take it because of my grade in the class
2 - Hopefully Don't have to take because of my grade
3 - Insanely Easy
4 - Boring
5 - Mildly difficult
6 - Moderately Difficult
7 - Difficult
8 - As Difficult as Maya's Chemical Engineering final

Monday (12/6) - Lifetime Fitness (Rating: 3)
Tuesday (12/7) - First Year Seminar (4)
Thursday (12/9) - Music Business Seminar (5)
Friday (12/10) - Computer Fundamentals (4)
- Quantitative Mehtods in Business (1)
Monday (12/13) - British Literature (2)

And thats it. Essentially, if I get a high enough grade on my essay revision in Brit Lit, I will be done with finals on Friday morning. And my flight doesn't leave until Wednesday the 15th. How much does that suck? (and by suck, I mean rock in an odd sort of way)

50 Most Frigid

www.filmthreat.com recently released their list of the 50 least intriguing people in Hollywood of 2004. Here's some highlights:

1. Michael Moore - "But, hey, look on the bright side; no Presidential candidate endorsed by Michael Moore has ever won an election. So, Michael, why not endorse a Republican in 2008, just to see what happens?"

2. Halle Berry - "If she makes any more muck along the lines of Gothika and Catwoman, the Academy should send Berry a self-addressed stamped envelope and a letter requesting the return of her Oscar."

3. Michael Eisner - "Did Dopey give Eisner a blood transfusion?"

4. M. Night Shyamalan
5. Ben Stiller/Owen Wilson - "There was a time when a Ben Stiller flick meant plenty of belly laughs. Today, a new Ben Stiller movie is as funny as a thick, wet and chunk-filled fart."

6. Nicole Kidman
7. Reese Witherspoon
8. Jimmy Fallon - "The guy most notorious for blowing his lines on Saturday Night Live crossed over to the big screen in “Taxi” – and nobody cared."

9. Paris Hilton - "Honestly, we can’t think of any way to stop her. She's dumb to the point where even "dumb" is embarrassed.'

10. Ben Affleck - "He’s been cursed with the incredible shrinking career: dumped by J.Lo, ignored by audiences, and reduced to making guest shots on TV celebrity poker tournaments."

Others of note:
15. Ashley Judd - "Is it possible for her to play one more “female police officer” or “high powered attorney” aside either Samuel L. Jackson or Morgan Freeman? With Judd, it's either cop, lawyer, victim or cute-girl-down-the-hall, either way she's sure to spend time lounging around in her bra. All the movies combined make a DVD boxed set… of poop."

20. Ashton Kutcher - "It’s okay to use your indoor voice, really it is. And the whole P. Diddy thing is super annoying"

22. Hillary Duff - "Two teen twits bickering over who’s the most empty-headed, disposable pop star is actually more entertaining than their movies. Duff VS. Lohan – A Steel Cage Match! "

25. Meg Ryan - "Some perverse laughs can be found in watching her try to frantically save her career, but that novelty will wear off in due time."

32. Adrien Brody - "At least Catherine Zeta-Jones gets to talk in her TV commercials."

36. Tim Burton - "Just make sure that no harm comes to Mr. Wonka, his Chocolate Factory, or Charlie and perhaps we can learn to forgive and forget."

42. John Travolta - "We still have a bone to pick with Quentin Tarantino for making Barbarino an A-lister again. Not that he's done anything with his status."

45. Natalie Portman and Keira Knightly - "One or the other, it's that simple. Really. It's just too damn confusing."

Yeah, check out the rest of the list if you want.

I Heart MN Senators

Norm Coleman, you devil.

http://www.cnn.com/2004/ALLPOLITICS/12/01/annan.coleman/index.html

I don't need any evidence for Mark Dayton, except that we're like this because I met him in 9th grade when I was the Franklin Student Council President and he was just a lowly candidate looking for a PR boost. He's really short too.

Reflections on "House of Sand and Fog"

It's amazing that they can make a movie centered around a property dispute and have it be that good. Lots of deep crap about identity, happiness, success, etc... Definitely worth watching, but not if you don't feel like being a tad bit depressed after.