A eugoogoly

Farewell Ken Jennings, you trivia king
We knew thee all too briefly.
While challengers came and challengers went,
you dispatched them all so chiefly.

We may never know the full extent
of your knowledge vast,
but we can try to follow the path you've layed
paved with knowledge of the past.

I can honestly say I never actually saw
an episode that you were on
but you still impacted my life in profound ways
especially now that you're gone.

May the world forever remember you deeds,
your Mormon-ness and you prowess.
Now Alex Trebeck can move on with his life
and you can go whoop Bobby Fisher at chess.

Amen.

Great moments in lyric writing

Get out (Leave!)
Right now

- "Get out (Leave)" by Jojo

Girl you're my angel, you're my darling angel
Closer than my peeps you are to me baby...
...She was there through my inacarceration
I wanna show the nation my appreciation.

- "Angel" by Shaggy


You always dress in yellow
When you want to dress in gold

- "Why Not" by Hillary Duff

All you people look at me like I'm a little girl
Well did you ever think it'd be ok for me to step into this world?
Always saying, "Little girl, don't step into the world"
Well I'm just tryin' to find out why, 'cause dancing's what I love

- "Im a Slave 4 U" by Britney Spears

Let me know if you think of any other classics.

Does this make any sense?

further evidence that I have no life: I just sat down and figured out the price per meal for each of the meal plans offered at belmont and I am offically appalled. The plan I have right now is all 20 meals (brunch on Sundays) and comes out to $5.21 per meal. The next closest plan costs the exact same amount, but you only get 16 meals/week and an extra $100 worth of "Bruin Bucks" (basically money to pay for meals when you overuse your meal plan). This averages out to $6.11 per meal. The smallest plan is 10 meals/ week, plus $225 Bruin Bucks, for an average of $6.83 per meal! How big of a rip off is that?

Now, consider this: If I ate every meal at the caf and just used cash to pay each time, it would average out to $5.84. This plan makes the most sense, but they don't allow you to do it if you live in campus housing, so I'm stuck over-paying for a crappy buffet. I'm a little bitter.

But I get to go home tomorrow, so its all good.

She brought them up right

Well, there's a lady who died a couple of weeks ago and, on her deathbed, confessed to her children that she killed her husband and hid the body in a storage unit. Well, they found it, and there is an autopsy expected to determine when he died, possibly as long ago as 1990. Where did this date come from? It's the year the woman started telling her kids their father died in a car accident. My question: Wouldn't you want to have a funeral for him if your dad died? Maybe see an article on it in the paper? Or at least come and console your newly-single mother? I guess not these kids.

Now that's naivete at its finest.

http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/11/19/deathbed.confession.ap/index.html

Update on the Virgin Cheese Part II

Wow. So, I guess all of the "pre-approved" bidders that drove the price way up have retracted their bid, cause now the highest bid is $3000. Too bad for the retard who posted it.

The MNF Controversy

Eh, too easy.

Update on the Virgin Cheese

Hey, if you want to follow this insane expression of American freedom, click on the link below:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=19270&item=5535890757&rd=1

Last time I checked, bidding was up to over $69,000, and the bidding doesn't end until Monday. That means Bill Gates has to spend the entire weekend trying to figure out some way to block the eBay servers so he can be the high bidder.

Direct from the CLC Library (thanks Jenny) 

Ok, SERIOUSLY, I'm in the wrong business

Yesterday I made a sarcastic comment about the person who tried to sell the grilled cheese on eBay that looked like the Virgin Mary. Well, I spoke too soon, as eBay has let it back up for bid, and some people rich in welath and not in brains have pushed the highest bid up to over $16,000!!!!!! Seriously, what the crap, how do I get in on this? Apparently, in response (and this is totally for real), two new grilled cheese auctions have been created. One has the imprint of the Virgin Mary's chewing gum. The other bears the image of Mary Kate and Ashley. Seriously, if you want to read how stupid this person sounds, read the article.

http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/11/16/ebay.sandwich.ap/index.html

Yahoo for school spirit

Last night I went to a pep rally for the Belmont Bruins basketball team (mainly bc they were giving away $500 to one person (no, i didn't)) and they had musical entertainment. This consisted of covers of Journey, Ashlee Simpson and Avril, among other things. Thats definitely the way to get college students worked up at 10:30. Sing crap. Gooooood call.

I'm in the wrong business

I love this: some guy tried to sell a half-eaten grilled cheese sandwich on e-bay that apparently bore the image of the Virgin Mary. I should sell my piece of cinnamon toast crunch that looks like a stigmata. I hear there's a big offer for anyone with a head of lettuce shaped like Moses. If you got it, I can hook you up.

http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/11/16/ebay.sandwich.ap/index.html

I Heart Dre

I love it when people blatantly perpetuate their own stereotypes. It brings such warmth to my heart.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Music/11/16/vibe
awards.fight.ap/index.html

Potential Excitement

So, I clicked on one of those po up ads today, and signed up for some trial memberships to different services, and now I'm pretty sure I'm getting a free X-Box. I'm really excited. It better work. I'll keep you posted.

Rich Michael Moore

So, Michael Moore is planning a sequel to "Fahrenheit 9/11" to be in theaters in two to three years. I can make 1 of 2 conclusions from this:
1. If we elect a Democrat, he'll shut up for a couple of years.
2. He's as greedy as the politicians and corporations he condemns. Hypocrisy? No, not him...

http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Movies/11/11/film.fa
hrenheitfollow.ap/index.html

My life is now complete

http://movies.go.com/moviesdynamic/movies/movie?id=685886

Seriously, I can die now. And I hope I do before I have to watch this filth.

Random things that I don't Understand

1. Killing/Injuring Senior Citizens: Every once in a while, I hear stories about people who killed their grandparents or burglars who stab 87 year-old women named Iris. I think there is a heirarchy of acceptablility in killing (from most acceptable to least)

1. Men aged 21-55
2. Men aged 55-70
3. Women aged 30-55
4. Men aged 70+
5. Women aged 21-30
6. Men 16-21
7. Women 70+
8. All women youner than 21 and men younger than 16

And the second thing...
2. Why is it that news programs have this fascination with stories of abused animals. Do they really have nothing more important to report than a guy who got arrested for having 8 malnourished dogs? I mean, sure, you can report it in the middle of the newscast, but does it have to be your top story? What does that about our values when they report a reclusive old woman with 75 disease-ridden cats over the death of two people in a car accident? I could care less about the affairs of Health and Human Services and Animal Control. Tell me what really matters, what could impact my life in a tangible way. Don't give me some 20-something intern reporting live from the reposessed animal farm.

Take that, NRA

http://www.click2houston.com/news/3899474/detail.html?subid=22100412&qs=1;bp=t

Poor Michael Moore

What's that, Mike? You can't get a Golden Globe for your liberal crap? Go make a hard-hitting expose... That'll teach them to mess with you. Yeah, thats the ticket... Huh? Yeah, you can put that next in line after you beat up the health insurance industry and take down that meanie over in Britain... Yeah, he is a pretty intimidating figure isn't he? So big and brauny and strong? Oh, wait, no, he's the slight of build Brit with brains... Oh yeah, good call goin after him, that should further your cause immensely.

Do you ever get the feeling that no one reads your blog, that you're pretty much just talking to yourself... Yeah, me too.

Marketing at its best

Pretty sure the marketing department at Dreamworks animation is amazing. They had the audacity to release "Shrek 2" on DVD on a Friday (typically Tuesday), the same weekend that Pixar released "The Incredibles" in theaters. That forced parents to decide if they would take their rugrats to the multiplex or Wal-Mart for entertainment, and most parents probably chose to pick up Shrek during their normal errands rather than take extra time out to go to the movie theater. Sure, "The Incredibles" opened to over $70 million, but their gross could've been over $100 million if it weren't for Dreamworks, who'll take a much smaller hit in DVD sales than Pixar will at the box office.

Genius.

Why the Cardinals aren't the only thing St. Louis needs to feel like crap

According to a Mens Health poll, St. Louis is the least sexy city in America.

Apparently Fremont, CA is the sexiest, which just proves that California is a secret government dumping ground for rich whores. ( The O. C.? What?)

Why Boston is Weird (but I still want to go there someday):

1. Yeah, the Red Sox won, but since then: John Kerry lost, the Patriots lost, the Celtics lost, and the Bruins are locked out.
2. The Boston accent is so messed up, computers can't even figure it out.
http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/3891181/detail.html?subid=22100410&qs=1;bp=t
3. They have some pretty stupid people, like the lady who handed out her engangement ring with Halloween candy.
http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/3883474/detail.html?subid=22100410&qs=1;bp=t

Possibly the greatest video ever

http://www.ebaumsworld.com/sportka.html

Great news for those with roommates:

Click the headline.
Merry Christmas!

Also...

Tonight is one of my favorite nights on television: the SNL Presidential Bash at 9 on NBC. This years cast is much improved over last year, basically because they took out Jimmy Fallon. So yeah, should be good.

so i'm a little slow...

Yeah, I know, I haven't done this in a while. My bad.

Anyway, I want to take this opportunity to let everyone know about the best night on television, just in time for November sweeps. ABC has been absolutely horrendous in recent years, ever since they over played "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?", but they have turned things around big time. This is most evident on Sunday nights.

First word of warning: NEVER, under no circumstances, tune in before 7 PM, as the classic reality show "America's Funniest Home Videos" is slowly dying the painful death it deserves. Just because you thought it was funny when you were nine doesn't justify putting yourself through that kind of pain.

Once 7 rolls around though, get ready for 3 hours of television enjoyment, starting with "Extreme Makeover: Home Edition". Unlike shows like "Trading Spaces" and "While You Were Out", this show gives deserving people a chance at a new life through a new home. By the end of the show, if you're not smiling, you have no heart. Period. The crew is fun, but not annoying, and they do some of the coolest renovations I've ever seen.

Next up is the best new show in years, "Desperate Houswives." While the commercials for this show during the summer made it look like a sexfest in suburbia, its not even close. There is one wife who is having an affair with the gardener, but beyond that, the stories focus on troubled marriages, dating after divorce, and parenting problems. All of this is woven around the mystery behind a neighbor's suicide. This show is entertaining to say the least, and I love Teri Hatcher as the dating sigle mom and Felicity Huffman as the mother of hyperactive twin boys who make her life hell.

Finally, "Boston Legal" comes on at 9. I was very disappointed last year when "The Practice" was canceled, especially after the new additon of James Spader. Much to my delight, they gave him his own spin-off series, and its much better than its predecessor. Its a legal drama, but its nowhere near typical. James pader as Alan Shore should win a second consecutive Emmy for the role. Shore may be the most underhanded, rude, and blunt character on network television, and I absolutely love him. His commentary is off color, random, and hilarious. Also, I normally dont like William Shatner, but his portrayal of Denny Craine is almost on par with Spader. Shatner also goes deeper into the dramatic than Spader, as his character deals with the complications of old age, including the prospects of Alzheimers.

So, yeah, this might sound a little like a John Hansen article, and I'm sorry for that, but I couldn't think of any other way to put it. If you haven't checked out this line-up, you have to. Seriously. Straight up. Peace out.